As Dory the Fish says, "Just Keep Swimming"

Yesterday marked one full week of the new treatment plan- Prednisone and Methotrexate.  So far, we have seen limited to no improvement.  Today was one of the worst days with Isabel being so tired and miserable that we could not stay for worship service.  Isabel attended her confirmation class and the rest of us attended Sunday School classes, but after the end of that 1 1/2 hours, Isabel was just not up for anything else.  And it was obvious to all who saw her. 

As we were driving home, we encountered the first snow of the season- good sized flakes, but not much accumulation.  Phoebe, Tessa and Liam could barely contain their excitement and the minute we pulled into our driveway, they jumped out and ran around the yard trying to catch snow on their tongues and scrapping what little snow they could from some stumps in the front yard.  Isabel never said a word, she just went inside.  When I joined her, she was looking out the window longingly and when I asked her if she was ok, she burst into tears.  She wanted to be excited about the snow but was in so much pain, she couldn't enjoy it. 

In general, it has been a rough few days.  When we did her methotrexate shot last night, she said it hurt each time I tried to break the skin with the needle, she cried out in pain.  I probably should have just pushed a little harder, but I gave up and called in Tim to give the shot.  I just couldn't bear to cause her pain and was certain I was doing something wrong. 

This morning was worse.  We made the mistake of leisurely starting our morning, not waking up the kiddos right away.  Big mistake... we should have woke Isabel up early to take a warm bath as she was pretty stiff this morning.  It was pretty much a snowball from there- the pain and stiffness were ahead of us.  When we got home from church, I had Isabel take a warm bath and try some yoga.  She really just wanted to lay around and do nothing.  But the book says I need to encourage her to keep moving, loosen up the joints.  And of course, since Tim is not reading the book yet, he was inclined to let her sit on the couch while I was pushing her to do some yoga.  I'm finding that I don't know how to determine the balance between coddling her, helping her and being empathetic.

Right now, I know that I just have to keep swimming- learning about this disease and how to make daily life better for my child.